Prime (noun)
the state or time of greatest vigour or success in a person’s life.

Hi, I’m Jason. This is where I share openly about the challenges, insights and lessons from my own journey. My hope is that these thoughts spark reflections that help you navigate your own path to living better and leading better. 

Jason Leavy
Founder

Prime Perspective:
Reflections on Leadership and Growth

If you’d told me a 73-second clip of Hollywood stars Brad Pitt and Adam Sandler in conversation would leave me in deep reflection for days afterwards I’d have been sceptical, yet here we are…

The footage is nearly six years old, but I saw it for the first time a week ago – I immediately felt it was worth sharing in last Wednesday’s Prime Performance, but I wanted to share how it’s been occupying my thoughts since in the hope that you can take something from it as well. 

I think it really moved me for 2 reasons:

1. In a world that increasingly seems to be full of noise, confrontation and rage, it was a salutary reminder that you don’t have to fall into that trap.

2. It made me question myself.

My first point is self-explanatory, but I want to expand on the latter.

In this newsletter you get to see me as a founder and as a coach. This is a huge part of my identity, but just like all of us I’m a work in progress. 

What struck me so much about the way Sandler handled that situation was it made me question whether if I’d been in his shoes I’d have had the dignity, the compassion and the courage (and I strongly believe it was courage) to take the high road like that.

My Underdog Mindset

The reality is that through most of my career I’ve felt like the underdog, and used that sense of being written off as energy to propel me forwards. For me, that felt more positive than adopting a victim mindset.

I’ve also tried my utmost to live according to my values – integrity, empathy, respect and accountability. 

But, here’s the thing: I’m genuinely not sure I’d have passed the ‘Sandler test’ if I’d come face-to-face with a couple of figures from my past. 

Do you know what though? After the past few days of absorbing Sandler’s magnanimity, I think I now could.

Do The ‘Sandler Test’

I think it’s a safe bet that you have those figures in your life as well, so I really want to encourage you to do what I did. 

I want you to put yourself through what I’m now calling the ‘Sandler Test’ for a moment and very consciously do the following 5-step exercise:

• Feel the initial sting of recognition – seeing that individual in unexpected circumstances

• Experience that surge of anger and the temptation for revenge

• Now really focus on making the conscious choice to rise above it

• Feel the power in choosing grace over grudge

• Notice how this choice transforms you rather than diminishes you

Don’t rush through this, really sit with those feelings at each stage and be curious about what’s going on in terms of those triggers and whether they are truly reflective of how you want to show up in life and how you want to be perceived by others.

Who Do You Want To Be?

I stress that because when I actually explored both pathways through visualisation it really made me realise that what I thought was an empowering path was a diminishing one.

Revenge may taste sweet in the moment, but ultimately there is nothing gained by walking that path. 

Yes I’m a work in progress, but I’m intentional about my growth. This week I learnt a big lesson about myself that will mean I’ll show up a little better in future. I want to be that guy. 

Progress is always possible.