How To Master Your Nervous System
How To Master Your Nervous System
PLUS: The Psychology Of Motivation Explained
September 20, 2026
“If you feel like you're in control of the stressor, then there aren't these toxic brain changes.”
\- Amy Arnsten
My last corporate role was global and HQ was Los Angeles, so I frequently ended up working from 7am-10pm.
In an attempt to achieve balance, I would protect my training rigorously. At the time I was doing CrossFit, and I’d step into the box, already in a ‘tired but wired’ state.
In my head, the gym was my release from the pressure. An opportunity to switch off for an hour or so and lose myself.
The problem was that I was treating my workouts with the same intensity with which I approached my role - if I wasn’t lying on the floor at the end, I’d berate myself for not pushing myself hard enough.
At a time when I was already living pedal to the metal, the sessions that I thought were my refuge were starting to resemble punishment beatings.
I was feeling run down, I was picking up injuries constantly, and my stress levels continued to rise.
I boxed when I was younger and I’m grateful for the lessons it taught me.
I used to suffer badly from nerves before each fight, especially during the weigh-in. On one particular occasion my opponent failed to show and I was matched with a substitute.
As soon as I found out who it was, my nerves disappeared and I relaxed. It was a guy who I’d beaten easily on points and who I’d knocked down in the final round.
When the bell rang to start the fight, I was really relaxed… until my opponent started tearing into me, desperate to avenge his loss.
Before I knew it, the round was over. I was confused and knew I needed to switch on. By the middle of the second round, the adrenaline was flowing and I was starting to find my groove.
By the third and final round, I was well on top and was pushing for a stoppage.
It was too little, too late. I lost a split decision.
The point of these two very different scenarios?
Your nervous system is fluid, not fixed.
When I was already wired, everything I was doing to try and deal with that was actually counter-productive.
Instead of switching my heightened nervous system off, it was keeping me in ‘fight or flight’ mode. I was on the road to burnout.
Before my fight, when I needed to switch on, the nerves weren’t there and I felt flat stepping through the ropes.
There's no version of high performance without stress. The only real choice is how well you manage it.
The cognitive athlete can down-regulate when wired and up-regulate when flat, and train that control under pressure.
Let’s explore…
THE SCIENCE
What I didn't understand back then is that your nervous system runs on two settings.
Your autonomic nervous system controls everything your body does without you thinking about it - heart rate, breathing, digestion and so on.
It runs on two main gears.
Think of your sympathetic state as your accelerator - the gear that gets you moving, alert, ready to perform.
Your parasympathetic state is your brake - the state that actually lets you recover.
Imagine this as a scale of 0-10.
A 10 is full fight or flight. A 0 is deep rest and relaxation.
Yale neuroscientist Amy Arnsten has spent years studying cognitive performance and her research shows that spending too long at either end of the scale impairs performance.
Sit too close to 0, and there's not enough happening chemically to properly engage your prefrontal cortex for anything demanding. That's fine if you're actually resting. It's a problem if you need to perform.
Sit too close to 10, and it's the opposite problem. Your prefrontal cortex - think of this as your executive function - gets overwhelmed and taken offline. You make bad decisions or struggle to make any at all.
The key is oscillation.
You hitting an 8 or 9 for short bursts is good stress - powering you through an important negotiation or a public address.
But try and maintain that state permanently and it will take a toll - it’s like a sprinter trying to maintain their pace over a marathon distance.
You need to switch back down and this runs largely through your vagus nerve - the physical pathway carrying the ‘stand down’ signal to your heart and organs.
When it's working well, your heart rate settles, your breathing deepens, and you start to rest and recharge.
The good news is that a major review of the research, published in Psychological Medicine, confirmed that people can be trained to shift more deliberately between these two states, with a measurable reduction in stress as a result.
THE PROOF
If anyone has had to master the skill of oscillation, it’s our Elite Performance Advisor, Kevin O’Connor.
Kevin was a Team Leader in the Special Reconnaissance Regiment. The SRR is the most secretive unit in British SF, responsible for surveillance and counter-surveillance operations.
This wasn’t the Hollywood world of abseiling through windows or kicking down doors.
It involved months of painstaking planning - a world where one simple slip-up could mean an operation that had taken six months to plan would have to be shut down immediately.
Imagine operating in an environment where, after weeks of surveillance, you are entering the home of your target.
Your level of preparation is so detailed that you have to count the number of eyelets on your boots before you enter and again once you’ve left.
Because when you’re up against other elite operators, a single mistake can compromise everything.
You can’t operate at this level of mental performance without knowing how to regulate your nervous system.
But speak to Kevin and he’ll also tell you how essential it was to down-regulate after going through those periods of intensity. To be as intentional about switching off, as you are about the preparation to perform.
That applies to your world just as much as it does to his.
THE APPLICATION
So you now understand your nervous system runs on a dial, not a switch.
You know training your ability to move up and down is the skill.
What does this look like in practice?
Train your stress response
“I can’t help it, it’s the way I’m wired”. No. Not true. Neuroplasticity shows us the brain is capable of ‘rewiring’.
The keys are intention, repetition and recognising transferable skills.
Psychologists call this stress inoculation training - the idea that deliberately practising regulation under controlled stress builds a skill that transfers to real pressure later.
That ice bath you’re doing? Think about what your brain and body go through as you enter the water. You’re deliberately choosing to enter your ‘fight or flight’ state.
What happens next? You bring your breathing under control. You find stillness.
That is a transferable skill. If you can tolerate extreme stress for a short period in the ice bath, you can tolerate it in a work situation.
You have agency. It’s about application.
Seek counter-balance
If you've had a punishing week and you're already feeling fried, a brutal HYROX session probably won't bring you back down.
It’s more likely to keep your accelerator pressed.
A walk in nature will do more for your nervous system than another workout that depletes you further.
Equally, if you’ve been feeling flat, don’t sit with it. Do an activity that will stimulate you - mentally, physically, emotionally.
Match the antidote to what you actually need, not what feels most virtuous.
Don’t confuse distraction with downtime
Doomscrolling looks like rest. It isn't.
Notifications, outrage, comparison - all of it keeps your body in a low-grade state of alert, even while you're lying on the sofa.
Swap it for something that actually lets your nervous system stand down - a proper conversation, a physical book or meditation.
Know When To Make The Call
You've probably heard "never make a decision in anger." Extend that rule.
The same is true of any state where your nervous system is hitting a 10 - fear, adrenaline, even excitement.
Buy yourself time to down-regulate before you commit to anything that has major implications. For you. For those around you.
Learn the physiological sigh
I’m leaving you with this because it’s simple, it’s evidence-based and you can start doing it today.
Stanford researchers found that a double inhale through the nose, followed by one long exhale through the mouth, is one of the fastest ways to bring your body back down in the moment.
It takes under 30 seconds. Do it before walking on stage, do it in the moment when you can feel yourself getting worked up. Either way, it works and nobody will notice.
That’s not everything, but it’s enough to get moving.
There’s more, but what I’ve shared here should be more than enough to get you started.
This is what I wish I’d been given years ago. Knowledge is power.
Master your nervous system and stop it controlling you.
Go well.
J.
LIVE BETTER, LEAD BETTER
The best content I researched this week:
1. I hope what I've shared is helpful, but it only truly matters if you act on it. Fortunately, Dr Masud Husain is on hand to talk you through the psychology of motivation. Anyone who has decided to do something and then not done it should listen to this.
2. “The single greatest challenge for any high-performing, ambitious person is eliminating the guilt associated with free time and rest,“ says investor and author Sahil Bloom. I love how he uses the lens of Jevons Paradox to explain the perils of constantly seeking efficiency.
3. Finally, a few simple slides that explain why not all downtime affects your brain the same way, even when it feels equally relaxing.
Share this with a fellow leader - we’re stronger together.
If this was forwarded to you, join hundreds of other top-level executives and entrepreneurs by subscribing here.
The Prime Performance Program
